Menopause can be a trying time…
We know that the partners of menopausal women do often bear the brunt being around them…
But they need you and your support. Because what you’re feeling — they’re probably feeling it a hundred times worse!
If you’re wondering how or what to do to provide much needed support for any menopausal women in your life…
Don’t worry, we got you!
Better Body’s Guide To Support Your Partners During Menopause
Today’ we’ve prepared a comprehensive guide on the different aspects you can support your partner through menopause!
Give it to your husband, pass it to your friend’s husband, read it and make a list of things you want your partner to do…
We hope this guide helps you in some way so you don’t have to feel so lonely throughout this major change in your life:
Rule #1: Educate Yourself About The Subject
Education is key to dealing with menopause. It is especially important to learn more about the symptoms they have to deal with every single day, including:
- Mood swings
- Hot flashes
- Night sweats
- Vaginal dryness
- Sleep problems
- Weight gain
- Dry skin
As a partner, understanding these things can prevent you from being insensitive and asking things like, “Why are you gaining weight?” or “Is your hair thinning?”.
Rule #2: Prepare for Mood Changes
Let’s be real here. Not everyone undergoing menopause has mood swings.
Some people, in fact, look forward to the transition and feel strong, happy, and hopeful for the second half of their life.
Our tip for you is to not assume that the worst will happen. On the other hand, if a bad mood develops, don’t automatically jump to the assumption that hormones are to blame.
They are sudden and often chronic changes in mood that disrupt one’s daily life, including work and relationships, which is why recognizing them and responding accordingly can help you both deal with them as a couple.
Rule #3: Tweak Your Relationship
Partners typically don’t discuss how to be supportive once menopause arrives. Unexpectedly, this can pose as a challenge because partners tend to spend more time once the children leave the nest
To prepare for this “next phase” of your relationship, it is important to tweak your relationship skills.
You can do this by discussing and setting some “ground rules” to help. This may involve knowing:
- When your partner needs some alone time
- When your partner desires support
- When it is time to disarm & step away from a fight
- How to be level-headed when discussing feelings when things get tough
Doing so can strengthen a relationship by affirming that you are both in this together. Taking an interest in your loved one’s interest can also help.
Rule #4: Communication is Key
Communication is an important cornerstone of any relationship, especially if one half of the relationship is someone experiencing menopause.
They do not know that you are on their side telepathically. You NEED to tell them that you want to be helpful, then your partner will at least know that you are on their side.
Just expressing that you’re there to help is a good start. Other things you can do is:
Be Patient — Patience is a virtue. If your loved one tells you that they “cannot control themselves,” believe them and be patient. Menopause is not a “problem” to solve, not a new stage of your relationship.
Don’t Make It About You — If your partner gets upset, don’t turn their upset into your upset. Let them know it’s ok to be angry, sad, or frustrated, and try to listen without judgment.
Say It If You Mean It — Not all of us can read minds, so don’t leave things unsaid. If you are not someone who easily expresses appreciation or admiration, now is the time to learn. If your partner looks pretty today, say so.
If it’s hard to express praise, say so… but still make every effort to praise.
Rule #5: Other, Practical Tips
In addition to working on improving your education and communication skills, adding some of these practical tips can help support your partner as well:
Offer & Actually Help — Offering to lighten the load around the house, and actually helping with the housework can help reduce your partner’s load. Things like doing the groceries, helping with the dishes and cleaning up really do help. Be proactive and see what they need help with.
Be Healthy, as a Team — Support your loved one’s health. Be the one that starts planning exercises to do together like a nightly stroll, or weekend bike rides. These can become a healthy ritual that you can both feel good about.
Sleep Better, Together — Insomnia is prevalent for women in menopause. To help your partner get some well-deserved beauty sleep, don’t overstay your welcome by staying up all night. Make it conducive for your partner to fall asleep as easily as possible.
Last, But Not Least…
Not every woman requires the same amount of support, so don’t quantify it.
The best way to deal with menopause as a supportive partner is to be attentive, be proactive, and remind yourself that the challenges of menopause involve both of you as a couple.
If you are unable to cope, do not hesitate to seek couples counseling.
There is no shame in working together with a therapist who can provide you with the tools & the right direction to improve your relationship whatever the challenges.
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